Not using table manners
Before You Begin
Pause and breathe. Even if this shouldn't be happening... accept that it is and embrace it with composure and calmness.
Calmness is the only way forward because without calm, there is no possibility for receptiveness and connection. Your child won't give to you any more than they see from you.
Never forget that a strong connection is fundamental, as there will be no correction in them if there is no connection with you.
The Core Problem
The child hasn't learned proper table manners and their importance yet, or has not retained what they have been told in the past.
What Will Make It Worse
Reacting with frustration, and expecting them to start doing something that they haven't learned will do nothing to improve things.
Additionally, making them feel embarrassed might lead to resistance and reluctance to try to improve or cooperate.
What The Child Needs
1. Expectations set: Discuss the expectations for table manners in a positive and encouraging manner. Explain why good table manners are essential in any environment, and how they contribute to making mealtime pleasant for everyone.
2. Modeled behavior: Model good table manners yourself and demonstrate how to use utensils, chew with your mouth closed, and engage in polite conversation during meals.
3. Enhanced self-regulation: Teach self-regulation skills to help the child control impulses and follow mealtime rules.
4. To practice with you: Engage in role-play activities where you and the child can practice using nice table manners together.
5. Positive reinforcement: Offer positive reinforcement and praise when the child demonstrates good table manners.
How To Have The Conversation With Your Child
Find a time to sit with them at the dinner table, free of distractions.
Begin the conversation in a positive tone, expressing that you are going to work on some fun skills with them.
Work with the child on the "What The Child Needs" pointers above, one-by-one.
Over the following week, be sure to give them praise when they do something you had shown them
The goal is to make them feel like they are "part of the group of big kids and adults" when they successful use their new and improved table manners.